August 4.2018

Steeling Himself for the Truth...

“Tariffs have had a tremendous positive impact on our Steel Industry. Plants are opening all over the U.S.. You can’t see them because they are making stealth steel. This is steel they use to make the F-35. This is an incredible plane. It's stealth—you can't see it. So when I talk to even people from the other side, they're trying to order our plane. They like the fact that you can't see it. I said, ‘How would it do in battle with your plane?’ They say, ‘Well we have one problem—we can't see your plane.’ That's a big problem. Stealth, super stealth. The best in the world. We make the best military equipment in the world. Also, remember this: jobs. Steelworkers are working again, and big dollars are flowing into our Treasury. Other countries use Tariffs against, but when we use them, foolish people scream!”




August 3.2018

The Father, Son, and the Goalie Hoax—Lemon Verbatim...

“In Helsinki, I had a great meeting with Putin. We discussed everything. We got along really well. By the way, that’s a good thing, not a bad thing. That’s a really good thing. Now, we are being hindered by the Russian hoax. It’s a hoax, okay?”



August 2.2018


Remains to Be Seen...

“Thank you to Chairman Kim Jong Un for keeping your word & starting the process of sending home the remains of our great and beloved missing fallen! I am not at all surprised that you took this kind action. You told me you keep lots and lots of human remains of people you have exterminated in your beautiful palaces. I know it is hard for you to part with some of your collection. Also, thank you for your nice letter - l look forward to seeing you soon! XOXO!”



August 1.2018

Over-Stain Your Welcome...

“This is a terrible situation and Attorney General Jeff Sessions should stop this Rigged Witch Hunt right now, before it continues to stain our country any further with my over-the-top obstruction. Bob Mueller is totally conflicted—he once thought for my country club dues were too much—and his 17 Angry Democrats that are doing his dirty work digging up facts—a disgrace to USA!”