The Innuendo Justifies the Mean...
"Lightweight Senator Kirsten Gillibrand, a total flunky for Chuck Schumer and someone who would come to my office 'begging' for campaign contributions not so long ago (and would do anything for them) by which I mean I am a completely repulsive example of a man!"
A Moon of One's Own...
"The directive I'm signing today will refocus America's space program on human exploration and discovery. It marks an important step in returning American astronauts to the moon for the first time since 1972 for long-term exploration and use. This time, we will not only plant our flag and leave our footprint, we will actually go to the moon and not just on FAKE TV! Another false story that I watch 4-8 hours of television a day - Wrong!"
Birther of a Nation...
“The Civil Rights Museum records the oppression inflicted on the African American community — the fight to end slavery, to end Jim Crow, to gain the right to vote — so that others might live in freedom. Today we pay solemn tribute to our heroes of the past and show how quickly their work can be undone by the Birther President!"
"This is a sick system from the inside. And there's no country like our country, but we have a lot of sickness in some of our institutions. Dementia or Pathological Narcissism?"
"After years of Comey, with the phony and dishonest Clinton investigation (and more), running the FBI, its reputation is in Tatters - worst in History! But fear not, we will bring it back to greatness. We're going to clean up the mess. We're going to get rid of Mueller so no obstruction of justice! And we're going to get a really great vacuum!"
Spark of Brilliance...
"Thank you. When I came into office, I promised to look at the world’s challenges with open eyes and very fresh thinking. We cannot solve our problems by making the same failed assumptions and repeating the same failed strategies of the past. All challenges demand new approaches. This is why I am taking the Tinderbox of the Middle East and pouring Rocket Fuel on it!"
Wrapping Up a Spending Package Fix....
"The Democrats are really looking at something that could be very dangerous for our country and that something is ME. They are looking at shutting down. They want to have illegal immigrants, in many cases people that we don't want in our country, they want to have illegal immigrants pouring into our country, bringing with them crime, tremendous amounts of crime. For years I've been bringing tremendous amounts of illegal money into our country – mostly through Deutsche Bank and laundering it in real estate. We are taking tremendous amounts illegal cash and cleaning it. It's like CLEAN COAL! Rocket fuel for the economy. Merry Christmas!"
Molester Moore or Less is More...
"Democrats refusal to give even one vote for massive Tax Cuts is why we need Republican Roy Moore to win in Alabama. We need his pedophile vote on stopping crime, illegal immigration, Border Wall, Military, Pro Life, V.A., Judges 2nd Amendment and more."
Hitting Denial on de Head...
"I never asked Comey to stop investigating Flynn. Just more Fake News covering another Comey lie! I said 'let it go'. I said it with air quotes which means that I didn't really mean it. And my lawyer drafted it for me. And it's not my voice!"
The Electoral Rusky-Aid Acid Test – Lemon Verbatim...
"Many people in our Country are asking what the “Justice” Department is going to do about the fact that totally Crooked Hillary, AFTER receiving a subpoena from the United States Congress, deleted and “acid washed” 33,000 Emails? No justice!"
"Biggest Tax Bill and Tax Cuts in history just passed in the Senate. Now these great Republicans will be going for final passage. The lower corporate tax rate will IGNITE our ECONOMY which we will be pouring rocket fuel on! Republicans will be exploding the national deficit and at the same time, exploding the sacred Republican belief that it is the worst thing to increase the deficit!"
What a world of merriment their melody foretells!
How they tinkle, tinkle, tinkle,
In the icy air of night!
While the stars that oversprinkle
All the heavens, seem to twinkle
With a crystalline delight;
Keeping time, time, time,
In a sort of Runic rhyme,
To the Flynn-Flynn-Tabulation
that so musically wells
From the bells, bells, bells, bells,
Bells, bells, bells -
From the jingling and the tinkling of the bells...
"I will tell you this in a non-braggadocious way – there has never been a 10-month President that has accomplished what we have accomplished. That I can tell you. That I can tell you. I will probably be the first-10 month president. Maybe the first 11-month president. Harrison served a month and Garfield served six months. I didn't know that until two days ago. But nobody's done what I've done to the country! Merry Christmas!"